All lives matter!

    

     Today I have decided not to post about my It Works business. My heart is heavy with the way our country is going. There is so much hate and anger in the world.
     I don't understand why this is happening? For years there have been so many fights, and wars based on the differences of humans. These differences range from religious choices to the color of our skin. I can go back at least a 200 years with examples. We have the Native Americans who were forced off of their land,  the Civil War and the fight against slavery, WWII and Hitler and  his opinion of the Jewish people, the Japanese Americans who were citizens of the United States and forced into camps, and so many other examples. 

     What have we learned from our past? Apparently nothing. We are still trying to pick one religion that is better than the other. Why can't we be ok with just letting everyone having their own beliefs? None of us really know who or what God is, isn't it enough that we have something to believe in. To pray to when times are hard. Be it Buddha, a sun god, Jehovah, or the Virgin Mary, this is something that gives us hope.
     Now the focus is on skin color. Black, White, Hispanic, Asian, or whatever your heritage, the color of your skin does not define which race is better than the other. It is great to have pride in your heritage, to celebrate what makes you who you are! But underneath that skin we all are made up of the same thing, we all bleed red.
     Why are we all of the sudden hating cops and shooting everyone? What is this solving? I am not saying that a few all cops are good, there are enough reports in history that prove this. But to the person who refused to set next to a cop at a restaurant, what if that is the cop that is called to your home in an emergency? To the surgeon who had to put aside his prejudice to operate on victims, shame on you! You took an oath as a doctor to save lives and it doesn't matter who it is. That is the job you chose. I am so sad that people are acting like this.
     I wish history would stop repeating itself and that people would see the negative message we are sending our kids, the world we are leaving our kids. From one of the greatest speeches ---Martin Luther King Jr.

"I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: “We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal.”

 will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character. I have a dream today. This is our hope. "
 

"And if America is to be a great nation this must become true....

And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God’s children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, “Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!”

        
    

Sunday..let's make it about family!!

     Happy Sunday, I hope this day finds you full of blessings! Sunday used to be the day of rest, a day to give rejoice to God, and a day to unwind with friends and family. Now it is like every other day in many households! I do not go to church very often but I do take a few moments each day to read a quick verse and say a prayer. Also during football season Sunday is spent watching NFL games, Saturdays are devoted to my college teams! Go K-state...I may be in Iowa but I am a Wildcat by heart! We our a house divided team--I love the Packers and can you believe it I fell in love with a Vikings fan! Never a dull moment in our house during these games!!

     Now that I am off track and apparently ready for football season-I wanted to take a few minutes to discuss why we should take care of ourselves! I am a mom and I spend around 90% of my day focusing on my family, I spend another 9-10 hours a day at work, and then maybe 1-2 hours a day on my It Works business. That doesn't leave me enough time to do the things I love to do, but time to do the things I have to do. I love my family, and both of my jobs, in fact I wouldn't change a thing. We do though all need time to unwind! This goes for men, women, and children. Spend some time doing things you love, reading a book, walking, fishing, taking the family to the beach or lake. This is so important in the world we live in. To unplug from the internet, and our phones, and really focus on our families.

     I also believe in spa days, we also have pajama days! No, this isn't just for women! I found an article this morning that really describes this well! Visit http://rhagan.itworks.com/or send me a message for more information about facials and skin care products.

Read the article here-- http://beautysouthafrica.com/healthy-living/why-you-should-pamper-yourself

"Do you take as much care of yourself as you do of others? If you don’t, you could be heading for burn-out. Chances are, at the very least, you’re not experiencing much abundance and joy in your life.
So why is it so hard to pamper ourselves? Do we think of pampering as indulgent, selfish, or narcissistic? Do we feel guilty because it’s a ‘luxury’? Many of us, consciously or subconsciously, believe it’s a waste of time and money, that we should be doing something useful instead, that being stressed is ‘normal’, or – most insidious of all – that we somehow don’t quite deserve to be pampered.
Yet taking proper care of ourselves is essential for physical, mental, emotional and spiritual wellbeing. The better we feel, the more we’re able to engage fully with our lives and the richer our relationships with other people become. A good pampering session can balance us from the inside out, refreshing, relaxing and rejuvenating us, making us happier and saner, all of which we’ll carry with us into our dealings with the wider world.
The demands of our fast-paced lives take a toll on our bodies in many ways. Stress increases the risk of obesity, heart disease, diabetes, arthritis, gastrointestinal disorders, and cancer. When we’re stressed we don’t sleep well, we don’t eat sensibly, and we certainly don’t take the time to stop and smell the roses. We begin to feel exhausted, discouraged, bored, resentful and frustrated. Our relationships suffer, creativity dries up, productivity falls, and quality of life becomes a distant memory. We need all our energy just to get through the day, we have little left to give to anyone else, and taking care of ourselves comes last on the list."

Beauty

    

      I hope you had a wonderful Wednesday! It was definitely an interesting day! I always love ending the day visiting with my boys and my love. As much as I love my alone time, I must say I miss having everyone home. Not seeing my kids for the summer is hard, I miss them so very much! This is partly why I decided to start selling It Works! It keeps me busy and provides some extra spending money ( who doesn't love a that)!
     As hard as this is to type, last summer was a rough one! It was my first summer without my kids and I worked all week, while my boyfriend worked nights every weekend. I was sad, lonely and angry. It took me having a huge life change to realize I had to change. Have you ever felt like you were so angry and you know it's wrong, but you can't stop? That was me a year ago. I never want to feel that way again!  Does it make me a weaker person- no. I had to admit to myself I needed to change and like all things you really have to want it! I now take Zoloft everyday and I don't feel ashamed. I spent many years feeling that way off and on, and now I can rationalize without getting upset.
     Fast forward to now and life has changed 100%. I had to fix my internal me before I could focus on my external self. We always find flaws with ourselves when we look in the mirror or wish we looked different in pictures. I know I am not the only one. I am woke up every morning with a " good morning beautiful". Do I feel that way? He makes me feel loved but I see 100 things I wish I could change every time I look in the mirror.  So in addition to losing weight I am going to work on feeling more beautiful!

From http://www.wikihow.com/Feel-Beautiful---- read more at this link! Great advice!
The greatest beauty tip of all is knowing that you are already beautiful as you are! Sometimes, though, it's hard to acknowledge your own beauty when you just don't feel beautiful. Here are some things you can do to remind yourself that you're already beautiful and that everyone is beautiful in some way or another. I love this!!

Journal about your positive attributes.^[1] Start a gratitude journal that highlights your appreciation for what you love about yourself the most. By staying grounded in your good qualities, both your inner and outer beauty, you will keep these things more present in your mind. This way, each time you have a moment of self-doubt or face an rude remark from someone else, the things you cherish most about yourself will be ready at hand.

Take a look at your relationships. If you have steady doses of fondness and acceptance, you will always be able to see yourself in the positive light that your loved ones do. Similarly, if you spend lots of time with overly harsh or judgmental people, you will learn to view yourself according to their rigid, critical standards. If you are filled with the notion that you are unattractive or unworthy, question whether or not someone in your life bolsters this idea.^[3]

• Make sure that you have a good support system of friends and loved ones. There’s nothing more effective than social support to make you feel strong, capable, and beautiful.

Get active. In addition to benefits like weight loss, exercise has also been linked to fewer depressive symptoms and a lowered risk of heart disease.^[8] This means that keeping a regular exercise routine will keep you feeling uplifted, energized, and secure in your good health. If you find it difficult to find the motivation to begin, try starting small by adding brisk walks to your week. Then, you can gradually increase the amount of cardiovascular or strength training exercise to the degree that your lifestyle permits.

• Try to exercise in ways that increase your flexibility. This way you will learn to see your body as something that is always evolving and changing.

So here is my challenge----I want each one of you to post one thing about yourself in the comments that you find beautiful about yourself! Let's get positive!

Why do we judge?

     Why are we always the first to judge our own decisions? Or judge someone else's decisions? I don't mean just about our looks, we judge each other on race, religion, skin color, and sexual preference. This weekend we watched Free State of Jones, this movie is incredible. One man stood up and helped change history, and he didn't let anyone stop him. I don't know how many times I cried while watching this. I firmly believe it isn't our place to judge others for their decisions.
    
     I don't understand the attraction to another woman but I have many friends who are in same sex marriages. They are completely happy and that makes me happy. Do I have to understand their attraction to the same sex? No, I see two people in love and that is what matters. This applies to all things that the world seems to be fighting about. We are all unique but we have one thing in common; we all bleed red. We are all fathers, mothers, cousins, aunts, uncles, friends, and family.

     My picture says " look in the mirror, that's your competition." This is so very true. My challenge from now on is to be a better version of me. If you start judging yourself or someone else, stop and look in the mirror! How do you see yourself?  We all have our own battles, there is no reason to add to anyone else's battle.

     I found another blog today that inspired me for when I am doubting myself, great advice! Check out the whole blog at the link below!

---Blogger Lynn Newman http://tinybuddha.com/blog/5-immediate-and-easy-ways-to-silence-your-inner-critic/
     "If you’re working on something and all of a sudden you start questioning yourself, if you feel your energy decreasing, if you’re getting stuck, bored, or tired, recognize the judge is speaking to you.
     Listen, but don’t take his words to heart. See him so that he doesn’t hang out in a distant corner manipulating you from above.
     Identify him with presence rather than pushing him way. Because what we resist will persist!
     Once you see him, here are 5 immediate and easy ways to respond to your inner critic. It’s so simple that it may seem unrealistic, but it works. Memorize it and keep it close like a mantra.




When your inner critic acts out, say:

1. So what?

So what if you think that? That doesn’t mean it’s true.

2. Who cares?

You think your judgments means something to me? They don’t!

3. Big deal!

Oh seriously, big deal! Really, big f’n deal!

4. Why not?

Why shouldn’t I do this? You’re telling me I can’t? I won’t? I’m not worthy of it? Why not? I’m going to continue doing this anyway, because I can! No matter what you say, I’m going to just keep diving in.

5. What if it doesn’t matter if I am __________________ or not?

     Fill in the critic’s judgment here. For example, what if it doesn’t matter if it’s good enough or not? If it’s weird and people might find me strange?
     What if it doesn’t matter if it shows my talent and I will be recognized by others for it or not?
And even, “What if it doesn’t matter if it’s beautiful or not, because I’m going to keep giving myself permission to keep on painting anyway no matter what you say!”
     Feel how these questions empower you, and whatever you are doing, keep doing it anyway. Keep meeting the dream, the project, your creative expression.
     Keep going, forging ahead, building one block at a time.
The inner judge rarely goes away. As long as we have minds, he will continue to find ways to torture us. But we can identify him and say: “I see you, judge!”
When we identify the inner critic like this, we take away his power and regain our own."

Wednesday and role models :)

 

Good morning!! It is Wednesday and that means we are 1/2 way through the week! Today made me think about role models. We all have them, those people who inspire us to be better. My #1 role model was my grandpa. I talked about him on Father's Day, he was an amazing man. I have many friends who inspire me, each in their own way. I find myself blessed in so many ways. Am I a role model? I hope so, I hope that I teach my kids right from wrong everyday. That I inspire them to reach for the stars, and that nothing is impossible.

     Now for famous ladies....I have 3 who I just absolutely love. Melissa McCarthy, Lucille Ball, and Betty White. Not only are these ladies hilarious, they are all very beautiful. I love to laugh and these girls are great at that! They have all made it in a world where age and beauty are a huge factor. Lucy made it to TV in the 50's with an interracial marriage (not common then) and her show was a success. Melissa McCarthy is so funny and a great role model! She is beautiful at any size but she looks fantastic!! And Betty, well she is just amazing! She goes for great causes, and even has an older actress she is a hoot! Plus she makes old age look fantastic! Who are your role models?

If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.

- Catherine Aird

 
 

  

Father's Day

Anyone can be a father, but it takes a real man to be a daddy." - Anonymous

I found this neat article this morning....he sums it up well!

     A good father makes all the difference in a child's life. He's a pillar of strength, support and discipline. His work is endless and, oftentimes, thankless. But in the end, it shows in the sound, well-adjusted children he raises. On Father's Day, much of the world will take the time to appreciate the work of good fathers. While you show your admiration for your own dad, take the time to see if you yourself have what it takes to be a great father, whether you have children or plan to.

     A good father loves his children, but he doesn't let them get away with murder. He strongly disapproves of his children's misdeeds, using tough love to prove a point. He does this through the power of his words, not his fists.
Likewise, a father doesn't reward his children for actions that are expected of them, such as helping with house chores or performing well in school. If his child drops out of school, the father demands that he provide for himself, considering the child no longer wants to invest in his own future.
The rest of the article is here:
http://www.askmen.com/money/body_and_mind_60/96b_better_living.html

I was blessed to be raised by my grandparents. I loved my grandpa dearly! I also miss him everyday, there are times I wish I could just pick up the phone and call him. He taught me how a man should treat a woman, the importance of hard work, and so many more valuable lessons. My favorite memory was my Junior Prom--I didn't have a date and he bought me my corsage. To this day that still makes me cry. He has been gone almost 8 years this year--  Never take time for granted, it's not always guaranteed.




I am also blessed with a great boyfriend. He has stepped up to the plate since day 1 and always been there every day since. I love him so very much! Remember to say "I love you", not just on Father's Day but everyday!

Life is one crazy ride, make it amazing!

So many changes…..new adventures…..

     A year ago if someone told me my life was going to change so dramatically,  I would have laughed. Things needed to change a long time ago! First off, Conner is medication and seizure free! I count my blessings every day that he no longer suffers. I am now divorced and I feel like 1000 pounds have been lifted off of my shoulder. This whole process didn't come without a lot of critical input from others.

     In the beginning everyone that I was around every day knew how tired and stressed I was. It’s no fun coming home to a house when you no longer consider it your home, when you are there and you feel like you don’t know the person you married anymore. Things change and people change. I tried as  long as I could and then when he was ready to try, I gave up and I know now that I made the right decision. If actions speak louder than words than his actions say a lot! Now I wake up and I can breathe, and although I am faced with many challenges, my day always begins with a smile. They say you always take away something from each situation in life, this time I have my kids, and the knowledge of what both of us did wrong. It wasn't a one-sided problem, it takes both people realizing their mistakes and being able to face them together.

     In a couple of weeks I leave Kansas to start a new chapter in my life. I am terrified, excited, nervous, and extremely happy! My kids are also excited which makes the whole process so much easier!  You think you know what love is….and then you meet that one person who makes you realize you had the whole concept wrong! (Maybe I am learning with age J) It’s amazing how one person can make you feel so incredibly loved, like you are the most important person to them. I don't know how many times a day I see something and I think that I wish he was here to share this with me. How he just accepts my kids and is amazingly wonderful with them. All of those small thoughtful things add up to be something incredibly special. When it was raining and he switched me sides on the bleachers so I wouldn't get so wet, pulling over in crazy city traffic because I was a nervous wreck, and leaving my car parked, 8 hour phone conversations, long distance date nights….so many things! If you hadn't guessed it I am head-over-heels in love………….life is definitely a journey!


Update: I have been Iowa for 2 years and I love it! I miss my old friends but I am making new friends. I am still head over heels with that crazy boy, and our relationship has never been stronger! We have had a few rough patches but we talk. I admit when I am wrong, that becomes less painful each time! He is amazing with the boys and I love our little family!